(The dread ObamaCare is about to pass... sounds like this weekend will finally see a vote despite valiant yet hilarious attempts to snuff it. Neither they nor we could stop it, so we're re-posting this warning from earlier this year: As all of our work, it's still prescient and insightful, and extremely well-written).
Our patented Lens of Blather is an instrument which allows us to see into the fearful future as predicted by talk radio radio hosts, Fox News seers, and certain members of Congress.
It's a fearsome, gruesome, loathsome place at the bottom of a dozen slippery slopes; moral declines into festering bogs of unintended catastrophes- all forsoothed and told-you-so-ed by some of the greatest minds and towering moral exemplars of our time: Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, Glenn Beck, Laura Ingraham, Neal Boortz, and Sean Hannity. Not to mention Bart Stupak, Michelle Bachmann, and the late Eric Massa.
We don't venture there often, but we opened the Lens last week to glance into the terrifying future-world of post-Obama health care.
Sad to say, everything talk radio and Fox News said would happen has. America didn't listen to Rush way back in '09, “The crisis in health care is like the crisis in everything else, manufactured… There is no crisis."
With Obama-care, turns out, we got our crisis.
Once it was "take two aspirin and call me in the morning," now it's "Suck on this, and call me next year."
Just
as Limbaugh predicted, administration of the massive new program was
turned directly over to Amtrak and the Post Office.
(photo: "fearsome, gruesome, loathsome")
In line at the PO/med center/train station, you're as likely to find yourself behind someone with a head wound as someone mailing a Mother's Day card. Trains come and go, some are empty, some loaded with the halt and the lame off to the Medical Camps. A urine sample goes in the mail slot with the bread and butter note to your Aunt Tudie, and presumably has the same chance of getting shunted to the Cleveland dead letter office. Pregnant women go to the head of the line only if they're in labor- "Special Delivery" has a new meaning in Obamunism.
As Laura Ingraham and Glenn Beck so presciently tried to warn us, Obama's main objective and the very core of his health plan is to ensure that Americans die young.
"Aging is inefficient," says a civil service health czar. "Old people are a drag on the system." These czars, all young, black males from the mean streets of Harvard, work 9 to 4:30 (with an hour for lunch; holidays, weekends, and Lenin's Birthday off) telling little old ladies and their husbands whether they can live or head for the "hospice chutes." (Getting old is discouraged, legislation banning it is pending in the Congress).
Just
as
Sean Hannity predicted, the warm, loving arms of the insurance
companies will be torn from patient care by "… a government rationing
body that tells women with breast cancer: 'you’re dead.'”
He was right: government thugs have stepped between citizens and their doctors. Powerful bureaucrats make the decisions: who gets the kidney dialysis, the lap-band surgery; the full-term pregnancy, the hair-plugs, the bypasses, the Caesarians and lobotomies.
Boortz's words, “Obama’s health care plan is going to end up killing people..." fell on empty ears, and he was right: you're a goner unless you're young, black, gay, a wise Latina, or you give money to the DNC, the ACLU, SEIU or the NAACP.
Target demographics and friendly elites get places at the front of the long lines. Everyone else dies or goes to Craig's List for back-alley tonsillectomies, home chemo-therapy kits, and Mexican black market stool softeners. Drug dealers haunt senior centers with "street" ibuprofen, Flo-Max and Lipitor.
A doctor is paid $7 for a
craniotomy or $3.99 for a nose job, and while that might seem great for
patients, med school has lost its attraction to bright students, and
clogged with free university drop-outs, graphic
artists, community activists, and over-the-hill hip-hop
performers.
(Photo: the doctor is "in.")
Real doctors have few choices: become a personal physician to a billionaire Democrat, or get a night job at Subway.
(Talk radio topics for the future: Do you tip for your doctor like your hairdresser? 20% of a $7 brain surgery ain't much... do you tip the anesthesiologist? Do you really need one?)
As Hannity predicted, taxidermists, massage therapists and denturists fill in gaps in medical fields in need of practitioners. A doctorate in anything- even English- can mean a lucrative practice, and a respect previously undreamed of by English majors.
- Novelists often supplement their meager incomes doing hemorrhoid transplants; or prostate exams.
- Editors sideline as dentists, putting to use the innate myopia and cruelty that drew them to their chosen line of work.
- Sociologists, and historians with advanced degrees have been successful in the "lite" medical practices like opthamology, and podiatry.
- Anthropologists travel to Manila to learn "psychic surgery," the art of extracting chicken guts from the human body cavity without a scalpel.
Anxious patients flock to veterinarians, now allowed to practice their
gentle art on two-legged species. Spaying and neutering are real
alternatives in a world where the costs of health care makes
child-raising unaffordable. (Abortions are free, as Bill
Cunningham (KVI Sundays 7-10p) tried to tell us, and performed on every
street corner.
Anyone can get one- even men, little children and pets! Unborn fetuses
outnumber regular people in many small towns, are all registered
Democrats and allowed (or forced) to vote).
If he hadn't died from a botched ear-wax removal by an Atlanta dog groomer, talk host Neal Boortz could be self-righteous for his prediction that knee surgery would be declared "elective," and that the lucrative knee replacement industry and meniscus-trimming cartels would be shut down. Vast communities of the kneeless have sprung up (if that's the word) in California and in the Southwestern suburbs. In hellish, chaotic conclaves fortunately blocked off so children can't see in, elderly inhabitants drag their bad legs around like zombies and participate sadly in fruitless rituals like butt-kicking contests and lap dancing.
Other
procedures ruled elective or cosmetic by the bureaucrats: episiotomies,
anal bleaching, by-passes, and Caesarians.
It's every man's dream to be a gynecologist, and in this brave, new health world, any man can! Urban neighborhoods are plagued with door-to-door docs like the notorious Five-Minute Gyno, a former pedicurist who offers cut-rate pap smears and breast exams. "At your cervix!" he cries, but reportedly takes up to 20 minutes to do the procedures.
Self-surgery is very popular- especially with the libertarian kidz... and why not??? It's SO non-statist! Besides, no lines and the price is right! Not only body-piercings, and foot callus removal, but also fat globulectamis, orchiectomies and the occasional self-trepanation.
If America could only see what we see through our Lens into the future, maybe they'd forsake their own self-interest and listen to the talk radio geniuses who see the Obama regime for what it is: an autocracy of mercy who wants everybody to die.
Help protect our blessed right of uninsuredness, say no to heath care reform!
I know of two local blogs that would believe every word you just wrote....
Posted by: sparky | March 17, 2010 at 09:02 PM
Is that next to the last foto Michelle Malkin's vagina???
Posted by: Myrtle Mopup | March 17, 2010 at 09:12 PM
Not that I'm fond of the bill, at least let's put it in perspective:
The Top Ten Immediate Benefits You'll Get When Health Care Reform Passes
As soon as health care passes, the American people will see immediate benefits. The legislation will:
Prohibit pre-existing condition exclusions for children in all new plans;
Provide immediate access to insurance for uninsured Americans who are uninsured because of a pre-existing condition through a temporary high-risk pool;
Prohibit dropping people from coverage when they get sick in all individual plans;
Lower seniors prescription drug prices by beginning to close the donut hole;
Offer tax credits to small businesses to purchase coverage;
Eliminate lifetime limits and restrictive annual limits on benefits in all plans;
Require plans to cover an enrollee's dependent children until age 26;
Require new plans to cover preventive services and immunizations without cost-sharing;
Ensure consumers have access to an effective internal and external appeals process to appeal new insurance plan decisions;
Require premium rebates to enrollees from insurers with high administrative expenditures and require public disclosure of the percent of premiums applied to overhead costs.
By enacting these provisions right away, and others over time, we will be able to lower costs for everyone and give all Americans and small businesses more control over their health care choices.
I love socialism.
Posted by: joanie | March 17, 2010 at 09:17 PM
Michell Malkin has no vagina.
Posted by: Chief Wetblanket | March 17, 2010 at 09:25 PM
We already figured that, Ph(J)oanie- cursed be your soul....
Posted by: KS | March 17, 2010 at 09:29 PM
I would think the tax credit ( up to 30%) for small businesses would be attractive to the right.
One of the CEOs from Wellpoint was questioned the other day in committee in DC. She was asked what she makes...over 1 million in salary, with 8 million in stock options. She was asked if she would accept a little less for a bonus this year. Her answer:
"no"
Posted by: sparky | March 17, 2010 at 09:33 PM
Those dam greedy insurance companies - how outrageous ! An isolated case though. Overall, though, they average 2.2% profit - true story - not that much when compared to other industries... slightly below the median.
Another faux talking point. PT Barnum would be proud.
Posted by: KS | March 17, 2010 at 09:42 PM
I guess it takes a special level of evil to take from the sick and give to the shareholder. Probably worth a bonus to be that evil.
Read Michael Moore
Posted by: joanie | March 17, 2010 at 09:42 PM
IT'S GONNA PASS!!!
Posted by: Mark C. | March 17, 2010 at 10:45 PM
It is a sad state of affairs that the people of the San Joaquin Valley have been suffering unemployment, up to 41% because of a little fishy, the Delta Smelt. For over a year, Obama has done nothing to help relieve the peoples suffering.
Isn't it funny that when Obama's healthcare program is on the ropes, The Interior Dept announces that it will increase the water supply to the valley and all of the sudden, the valleys two blue dog Democrats are switching their votes in support of Obamacare.
There is little that can disgust me more than to see our government withhold water to use as a weapon against the American people. I know, they are just farmers and wet backs. Hell, my ex-brother-in-law, his wife and five kids live there (yes, they are darkie's, but Americans none the less and hold a piece of my heart).
Posted by: chucks | March 18, 2010 at 03:27 AM
It certainly looks like a done deal! Quite frankly, from what I've read of the bill I'm a bit torn on it. On the one hand I'm glad that a universal HC plan is about to be instituted but because of all that is seemingly contained in the bill, the potential impact could be somewhat scary. I must commend our POTUS, I didn't think he'd devote the attention to the health care issue that I believed Ms Clinton would - but he went way beyond (in terms of focus) what I now feel she would have done.
This can be a great start to a structured comprehensive plan that serves this nation in the manner deserved by it's citizens. After all shouldn't the greatest and strongest nation on the face of the earth have the most equitable treatment of the needs of it's citizens in basic necessities.
Indeed! Well done, Mr President...now, would you kindly see what you can do about replacing Ms Pelosi...she is a dolt and not a very good leader.
And Harry Reid...well, let's just say he apparently retired years ago and just hasn't yet told any one.
Posted by: Duffman | March 18, 2010 at 06:03 AM
It may pass but if so you can start writing the obituary for the Democratic Party. We will witness a tsumani to 'throw the bums out' in Novemebr. The bill will then be repealed.
The government can't take possession of 15% of the American economy overnight. This is un-American and everyone know.
The experiment has failed. Freedon: 1/20/13
Posted by: Obama is a black man | March 18, 2010 at 07:52 AM
Freedon? Is that like Moran?
Posted by: Coiler | March 18, 2010 at 08:53 AM
I am not as optimistic about this thing as Duff - I'll chalk that up to his Canadian roots.
I concur about his sentiments on Reid and Peelosi though. The butt-ugly tyrannical process used does detract from it in my view. This bill is the embodiment of (to use an Obama cliche) putting lipstick on a pig. I have always been disturbed about not knowing or anyone else having command of what is in this bill. The screaming message is be very wary of the unintended consequences. The Congress leadership and the president are ALL acting like petulant, spoiled brats and being unreasonable about passage of this bill. No humility to be seen here, just brazen hubris.
Here is a summary of a telling exchange between an unemployed woman (Ingrid Martin) and the President in Ohio on Monday, as reported by the Boston Herald;
(Martin) “He asked me what I would do, and I said the problem is that he’s doing insurance reform, but the problem is really the cost of medical care itself. I said we should fix things that are driving costs up, like defensive medicine and the need for tort reform,” she said. “He told me the bill handled all that, and I said ‘Well, I don’t believe it.’ ”
Ingrid Martin, of Brunswick, Ohio, called out the president of the United States. And at his own pep rally, to boot. “Oh my gosh, I’m calling the president a liar,” she said afterward."
But Democrats aren’t even talking policy anymore. They’re all about the politics. They’ve got to pass a bill - any bill - to save this inept poseur of a president from himself.
That’s the worst part of Ingrid Martin’s encounter with Obama. It showed the facts don’t matter. The trillion-dollar debt doesn’t matter.
And none of those Democrats in Congress understands the consequences of this bill as well as one unemployed woman in Ohio."
Obviously Health Care reform is needed, but comprehensive is always sloppy largely because of the mammoth size of this bureaucracy. The political timing may have been acceptable to one side but the fiscal timing is horrendous ! This rubs a majority of the electorate the wrong way. The process goes against the constitutional priniciples of this country and unfortunately for the Democrats, that is the take-away by much of the electorate. The absence of bipartisanship as displayed will eventually sink America if this persists like it has since 1/20/09 - not a threat, just a promise !
Posted by: KS | March 18, 2010 at 12:13 PM
Such iconoclastic mockery, Bla'M! Only you can find the hilarious in the hideous! ROFLMFAO!
Posted by: Fremont | March 18, 2010 at 12:19 PM
You mean the San Joaquin Valley will get more water AND 30 million uninsured Americans will be covered?
Will the horror ever stop??
Posted by: Tigsnort | March 18, 2010 at 06:02 PM
I love socialism.
Posted by: joanie | March 17, 2010 at 09:17 PM
You seem to also love communism, the ideology of the morally bankrupt..
Posted by: KS | March 18, 2010 at 06:30 PM
My beer addled brain conflated that second to the last pic, which was already bothering me, with Malkin's crazy eye, and I spontaneously laughed so hard that saliva hit the screen. Then I thought of the actual comment, and now I wanna get sick. :-)
Posted by: Jason Andersen | March 18, 2010 at 06:40 PM
I would trust a Fabian socialist over a robber baron capitalist; however, I don't see why it has to be an either/or. I think the best government would cherry pick from both systems.
Posted by: Jason Andersen | March 18, 2010 at 06:47 PM
So, if Oblahblacare does not pass, should the water remain turned off Tiggersnot?
What other kind of blackmail would you support to achieve a political objective?
How about in three years, and we have a Republican POTUS, should he withhold medical funding to the citizens of King County until Patty Murray agrees to vote for a Constitutional ammendment to ban abortion?
Your take is pretty short sighted.
When we take back the government (and we will ebentually, it goes in cycles)and now have control of the funding for your medical care, can we just fund procedures by the size of your contribution to the RNC?
Posted by: chucks | March 18, 2010 at 06:52 PM
No, healthcare should be withheld from you. You hate it anyway. And one less stoopid person on the planet would help.
And I always thought you were all about money. You don't like the idea of saving money?
The Democratic health care bill would cost $940 billion over 10 years and cut the federal deficit over the next two decades — figures that should help ease the worries of fiscal hawks who have been reluctant about supporting the sweeping measure.
The bill would reduce the deficit by $138 billion in the first 10 years and by $1.2 trillion over the second 10 years, Democrats said. It will expand coverage to 95 percent of Americans, according to Congressional Budget Office figures.
I think you need surgery to remove your brain from your ass. Maybe this bill will help pay for it.
Posted by: joanie | March 18, 2010 at 09:57 PM
Ph(J)oanie....please provide me one and only one government program that at the 'end of the day' saved taxpayers money???? Please please please!
Posted by: Obama is a black man | March 18, 2010 at 10:00 PM
I don't have to. I'm not the CBO. They are the number crunchers. Unless, of course, you like klueless are an accounting expert specializing in the American economy rather than the blowhard I believe you to be.
But, off the top of my head, Glass-Steagall. It was set in place to regulate Wall Street and kept the taxpayer from having to bail out banks for a long, long time. Until, Republicans (the corrupt party) deregulated them and destroyed our economy, put us into huge debt, and ruined the lives of many people. Thank you Phil and Wendy Gramm.
Now, why don't you tell me what programs you think are wasting taxpayer money? I'd be curious to know what you think is a waste.
Posted by: joanie | March 18, 2010 at 10:16 PM
"I don't have to. I'm not the CBO. They are the number crunchers. Unless, of course, you like klueless are an accounting expert specializing in the American economy rather than the blowhard I believe you to be."
You can't. So, keep whining and lieing like the aged trollup that you are. If you tried to, you would be fact-checked instantly, because you are known purveyor of half-truths. Case closed.
BTW, Which president signed Glass-Steagall into law ? You know and I know it. (The one before Bush 43).
Posted by: KS | March 19, 2010 at 09:20 AM
Hey, you had an opening -
correction...
BTW, Which president signed the repeal of Glass-Steagall into law ? You know and I know it. (The one before Bush 43).
Posted by: KS | March 19, 2010 at 09:22 AM
The Senate version of the Health Care Bill that the House is supposed to vote on tomorrow - is one big Cluster-F^^K ! This is one blog/website that discusses what is in the bill, which few if any of you really know about. Both the left and right have praised it - see the reader comments .
http://legalinsurrection.blogspot.com/2010/03/so-many-lies-so-little-time.html
Posted by: KS | March 20, 2010 at 11:43 AM
Clinton did a lot stupid stuff to appease the Republican congress, such as Defense of Marriage Act. I might be dense, but why do marriages between a man and a woman need robust, federal defense against gay families having basic rights? It just makes no sense.
Posted by: Jason Andersen | March 20, 2010 at 01:38 PM
Did the rest of you see the disgraceful crowd that harassed the man with Parkinson's at a rally? They were screaming at him to get a job and a couple of Darwin winners tossed dollar bills at him.
What an ugly face we show to the rest of the world. It makes me ashamed.
Posted by: sparky | March 20, 2010 at 05:36 PM
Scott Murphy, the man who replaced Ted Kennedy, the man who signaled the fatal tail spin into the depths of hell for the Democratic party....announced he is voting Yes tomorrow for the health care bill.
Posted by: sparky | March 20, 2010 at 09:51 PM
oh my bad...i got my republican heros mixed up..still....he is voting FOR the bill. That's what matters.
Posted by: sparky | March 20, 2010 at 09:55 PM
I only believe these reports when I see accompanying video and audio. Some of these reporters are shameless and will do anything to degrade the tea party or any conservative movement. That has already been shown by the use of the term "teabagger".
Mark Knoller, you should be called out for using teabaggers in your news report today - unprofessional and lack of ethics.
Posted by: KDS | March 20, 2010 at 10:56 PM
Did the rest of you see the disgraceful crowd that harassed the man with Parkinson's at a rally? They were screaming at him to get a job and a couple of Darwin winners tossed dollar bills at him.
What an ugly face we show to the rest of the world. It makes me ashamed.
Posted by: sparky | March 20, 2010 at 05:36 PM
Agreed. Inexcusable conduct.
Of course, after a few years of posting on this blog the selective outrage is amazing. Back when it was all the rage (you'll recall your using the anti war protest to score political points off of Bush) and a subject of much commentary none of us recall you being similarly upset when Code Pink types were standing outside of Walter Reed Hospital yelling at our wounded soldiers getting treatment if it 'was worth it to lose a limb.'
Somehow when it is a Dem in charge you are on board with War. Pot meet kettle.
Posted by: Puget Sound | March 21, 2010 at 06:14 AM
Clinton did a lot stupid stuff to appease the Republican congress, such as Defense of Marriage Act. I might be dense, but why do marriages between a man and a woman need robust, federal defense against gay families having basic rights? It just makes no sense.
Posted by: Jason Andersen | March 20, 2010 at 01:38 PM
Jason, I agree with you. The amazing thing about that act is that it passed in the Senate 85-14 others who voted for it include Paul Wellstone, Patrick Leahy, and Carl Levin. All good liberal Dems...
So when a bill passes 85-14 in the Senate and 342-67 in the House it has a lot of bipartisan support.
But I agree with your premise.
Posted by: Puget Sound | March 21, 2010 at 06:21 AM
oh Sparkles
I love it when you get your dander up in full 'Selective Outrage' pose.
Interesting that when the Code Pink types were standing outside Walter Reed Hospital asking wounded Veterans/Soldiers about 'was it worth a limb?' you had nothing to say about it other than they had the right to protest.
Posted by: Puget Sound | March 21, 2010 at 07:25 AM
If Rep. Clyburn, Barney Frank and any other Democrats in Congress want to whine about behavior of Tea party protesters to newsmen, someone has to produce the audio and video clips of it OR I will call bullshit on the Congressman and the news reporters who report this.
I will continue to believe are only out to get sympathy and play on the emotions of the voters about voting for this unpopular bill and will do what it takes because they are ruthless and the newsmen are aiding and abetting them, if they don't secure proof first.
I will continue to believe that until I see tangible proof to the contrary.
Posted by: KS | March 21, 2010 at 09:10 AM
Yes, KS, if you dont see it with your own eyes it never happened.
You keep holding that thought.
Posted by: sparky | March 21, 2010 at 01:13 PM
I will continue to believe...
I bet you believe in the tooth fairy, too. :)
Posted by: joanie | March 21, 2010 at 01:35 PM
Yes, KS, if you dont see it with your own eyes it never happened.
You keep holding that thought.
Posted by: sparky | March 21, 2010 at 01:13 PM
I will continue to believe...
I bet you believe in the tooth fairy, too. :)
Posted by: joanie | March 21, 2010 at 01:35 PM
Yep, that's right. You can ridicule what I wrote because that's all you are capable of and are unable to dispute it. Now, if it were Fox News, you'd be saying that you don't trust them, because they don't say what you want to hear - hypocrites !
(BTW- what I wrote applies to Fox News like everyone else)
Posted by: KS | March 21, 2010 at 10:28 PM
Shepard Smith is on our side, the fix is in
Posted by: Coiler | March 21, 2010 at 10:44 PM