Ask Billy Bob: "molehill out of The Mountain?"

(Billy Bob (whose name is neither Billy nor Bob) worked long in the Seattle radio market wearing a suit. He says the experience heightened his sense of irony, and diminished his circle of friends. He's taken readers' questions, today.

By Billy Bob

After my last column taking questions about local radio, my inbox was stuffed. Well, it was mostly porn. But there were a few radio comments and questions:

Dear BB: What's up with The Mountain always getting rid of their big personalities? John Fisher. Crow and West. Now they've axed Marty Reimer. What are they trying to do?  Signed, G.M. Donovan

Dear GM: Maybe they're trying to make a molehill out of a Mountain.

Dear BB: Gee whiz, all that fuss about Chuck Norris, Mt. Vernon's mayor giving a key to the city to Glenn Beck. Does that key even do anything? I mean will it open doors on any buildings in Mt. Vernon?  Signed, Mrs. Norris

Dear Mrs. Norris: That key will get Glenn into any Mt. Vernon honey bucket, and back in his old mailbox at the MV P.O.

Dear Billy: Mike Siegel once was a liberal talk show host. Then he became a conservative talk show host. Then he became a UFO talk show host, filling in for Art Bell. Now, Siegel is a financial talk show host on KKOL! What makes him qualified to be a financial expert? What has he ever invested in? Signed, Hugh Hewitt.

Dear Hugh: Answer: Hair plugs and plastic choppers.

Dear Billy: I'm appalled by the David Letterman sex scandal. I hope nothing like that would ever happen with any local broadcast celebrities. I'm concerned because Dave Ross seems to go through a lot of young female producers. Signed, Mrs. Ross.

Dear Madam: We have broadcast celebrities?

Dear BB: I heard a rumor that there's a new Seinfeld spinoff about Seattle radio. like Frazier. The actors who played the parents of Seinfeld's George Costanza are starring in this new sitcom. It'll be called "Frank and Estelle." It's about a constantly bickering couple hosting a morning news show on a station owned by a big religious outfit. Have you heard about this?  Signed, D. Hornby   

Dear Hornby: Seems far-fetched.

Dear Billy: Before Glenn Beck, there was this morning show on The Truth with two guys. One of them was Dan Sytman, the other guy was kinda forgettable and the show was called Sytman and something?  Sytman was funny and smart, but the other guy was a bit of a stick in the mud. I wish Dan should team up with someone else and do another show. Signed, Marge in Tumwater

Dear Marge: You may be in luck, Watch for the upcoming Sytman & Styble.

Dear BB: I'm sure you saw in the Seattle Times about how well KPTK does in the city of Seattle. Don't you agree that the station would do even better if they had a good local liberal? Wouldn't it be a great idea if they hired David Goldstein and put him on the air every day? He knows local issues better than anyone else in Seattle media. We need more diversity in our talk coverage. Signed, Northwest Liberal

Dear Commie Pinko: Trust the Program Directors They know tht Kirby Wilbur, Dave Boze, and Rush Limbaugh speak for REAL Seattleites- you know- free, white, and Republican... the secret majority.

Dear Billy: Why do you associate yourself with Blatherwatch when the owner has no radio experience at all? Let him try anchoring the KIRO morning news sometime and see how he does! Signed, Corporate Slut

Dear Suit: His ratings probably wouldn't be in the top 10, but neither are theirs! He might, on the other hand, get along better with Jane...
 

Comments

[AuthenticAndrew]

10/10

[Refugee]

very funny

[Gramma]

Dear Robert;
Do you know the where Allan Prell has gone? He would find an audience of one very happy liberal if he reappeared on the airwaves.

[AprilMayJune]

Allan - if you are out there, please check in. We miss you!

It would be heaven if I could listen to Allan on the inter-webs!

[sylvia]

He was fun to listen to.

[RobP]

>> Do you know the where Allan Prell has gone? He would find an audience of one very happy liberal if he reappeared on the airwaves.<<

An audience of one. That - in a nutshell - is why you won't hear Prell on the air in Seattle again.

As for Billy Bob - your material's getting a little stale, bub. Time for a new writer...