BlatherMunch9: eat me! candidates' recipes

I was pretty mad that BlatherMunch didn't get the scoop that John McCain's latest wife, Cindy's "family recipes" were lifted right off the Food Network website. Tell you the truth: Cindy's Ahi with Napa Cabbage Slaw, or Farfalle with Turkey Sausage, Peas and Mushrooms just didn't feel like home cookin' to me, even though the happy homemaker is a blonde cougar and wildly rich heiress married to a Republican U.S. Senator. 

But other bloggers got the story first, and we're hoping it just might be what Democrats need to tip the election from the futzy warmonger and his plagiarizing and -- dare I say -- elitist wife.

Food matters, people!

Too bad the McCain campaign put on airs instead of sticking to the Senator's BBQ ribs which would have kept it real for the hoi polloi. His BBQ wouldn't need plagiarizing or publicizing for that matter: the McCain-horny press have already done all the heavy lifting. This McCain fellation from CBS News’ Dante Higgins at a McCain patio party a few months ago:

McCain wore a white sweatshirt with a silk-screened family photo on it, sunglasses, a green baseball cap and blue jeans. As grillmaster, he looked like the all-American dad, with a story for every spot in the house. He explained that he loved to grill because it was social. He said it gave him something to do with his nervous energy while everyone could enjoy food and drink.
He shared his recipe for “practically” fat-free ribs. He rubs a salt, pepper and garlic powder mixture onto the ribs along with lemon and cooks them for an hour and a half to allow most of the fat to fall off. Fat-free or not, the ribs lived up to the hype. After three servings, I’m confident in reporting they were succulent and flavorful.

What do the other candidates cook, and eat? Does anyone care? The answer is a definite yes, at least judging from the fact that every one of their campaigns go to a great deal of trouble to get their recipes out there.

This from the adoring Huffington Post:

By now it's a well-known fact that Hillary doesn't bake cookies, but Barack has been known to brag about his chili, and today Good Morning America ran the recipe.

Obama Family Chili Recipe

• large onion, chopped
• 1 green pepper, chopped
• Several cloves of garlic, chopped
• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• 1 pound ground turkey or beef
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cumin
• 1/4 teaspoon ground oregano
• 1/4 teaspoon ground turmeric
• 1/4 teaspoon ground basil
• 1 tablespoon chili powder
• 3 tablespoons red wine vinegar
• Several tomatoes, depending on size, chopped
• 1 can red kidney beans

Saute onions, green pepper and garlic in olive oil until soft.
Add ground meat and brown.
Combine spices together into a mixture, then add to ground meat.
Add red wine vinegar.
Add tomatoes and let simmer, until tomatoes cook down.

Olive oil in chili??? Might that not be construed as... elitist?
~
Hillary Clinton doesn't bake cookies? That's just another blatant Clintonian lie!

How To Make Hillary Clinton's Chocolate Chip Cookies

• Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Brush baking sheets lightly with vegetable oil or spray with a cooking spray.
• Combine 1 & 1/2 cups of flour, 1 teaspoon of salt and 1 teaspoon of baking soda on waxed paper.
• Beat together 1 cup of shortening, 1 cup of packed brown sugar, 1/2 cup of white sugar and 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract in large bowl with electric mixer until creamy. Add 2 eggs and beat until light and fluffy.
• Gradually beat in flour mixture. Stir in 2 cups of rolled oats and then 2 cups of semisweet  chocolate chips.
• Drop batter by rounded teaspoonfuls onto baking sheets. Bake for 8-10 minutes or till golden brown.
• Cool cookies on sheets for 2 minutes. Place cookies on wire racks to cool completely.

~
It's been argued that Mike Huckabee's frank admission of squirrel-frying in his college dorm in a popcorn popper is what lost the primaries for him. But I don't believe it -- frankly, that actually endeared him to us. What I didn't like was his evangelicalism, cloying sincerity, and the loose skin hanging off him where his fat used to be.
~
Political consultants agree that the squeaky little Vegan, Dennis Kucinich might have had a chance if he'd   only been able to eat pork sausage at a pancake breakfast like a normal human being. Nutritionists agree he might be a foot taller if he eat a little crueler.

This from Barbara Bear made these for Dennis Kucinich when he visited Boulder, CO. "Dennis said, "Wherever I go, people make me chocolate chip cookies because they know I love them. These are honestly the best I've *ever* had!" :)" (Know the smiley emoticon is not mine)

Dennis Kucinich’s Favorite Cruelty-free Chocolate Chip Cookies
3/4 cup vegetable shortening
1/8 teaspoon imitation butter flavor
1 1/4 firmly brown sugar
2 tablespoons rice milk
1 tablespoon vanilla
Ener-G Egg Replacer equivalent of 1 egg
1 3/4 cup white flour
1 teaspoon salt  
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 cup chocolate chips
1 cup macadamia nuts
Blend until creamy the shortening, sugar, rice milk and vanilla.
Blend in egg equivalent.
Combine flour, salt and baking soda and add to sugar mixture gradually until all mixed.
Stir in chocolate chips and nuts.
Bake on ungreased cookie sheet at 375 degrees for about 8 minutes

~
Michelle can do no wrong in our book; that doesn't mean she's not going to say something stupid and honest at any moment, and fuck things up for Democrats for the next four years. That said, I believe she might actually have made this recipe doled out by her elitist husband' s campaign, but note the lazy cook uses store-bought pie dough:

Michelle Obama's Apple Cobbler
"I've been making this cobbler for a long time, so I usually just eyeball how much needs to go in. People might want more or less sugar, but this is how our family and friends like it. This recipe makes one cobbler, which is like a double pie."
Filling:
    ▪     8 Granny Smith apples, peeled and sliced [or a bag of frozen peeled apples]
    ▪     1-1/2 to 2 cups of brown sugar
    ▪     1-1/2 teaspoons cinnamon
    ▪     1 teaspoon ground nutmeg
    ▪     1/2 teaspoon salt
    ▪     1/4 cup white flour
Mix these ingredients together in a bowl and let it sit in the refrigerator overnight so the spice goes all the way through the apples.
Crust:
    ▪     3 sheets refrigerated pie crust
    ▪     1 stick of butter
Preheat oven at 325 degrees. Butter and flour the bottom of a large baking dish. Roll out three pie crusts real thin -- as thin as possible. Layer the bottom of the pan with 1-1/2 of the pie crusts and prick a few holes in it. Pour the apples with the liquid into the pie pan. Dot 3/4 of a stick of butter around the apples. Use the final 1-1/2 pie crusts to cover the apple mixture entirely (let the pie crust overlap the pan).
Pinch the edges of the dough around the sides of the pan so the mixture is completely covered.
Melt final 1/4 stick of butter and brush all over top of crust.
Reduce the oven temperature to 300 degrees. Bake at 300 for up to 3 hours -- that's what makes the crust flakey, like Barack likes it. Put the cobbler in the oven and go for a walk, go to the store, or do whatever you have to do around the house. Start looking at the cobbler after two and a half hours so it doesn't burn.

Comments

[joanie hussein for obama]

Michelle's cobbler sounds to die for but what does one do when Crisco is no longer acceptable in nutritionally-correct society? I love Crisco flaky pie crust!

I understand that old-fashioned lard is back in. No transfats there . . .

Kind of a disturbing column, Michael. I wonder if Tony Blair, Steven Harper, Nicolas Sarkozy or Vladimir Putin had to publish recipes to increase charisma and get elected. Somehow, I don't think so.

Only in America...

[YellowPup]

It's McCain's "nervous energy" that should concern everyone.

[DT]

I guess I'm going to have to be the one who says the emperor has no clothes ... and I'll try to be positive about it...

I had high hopes for Blathermunch, and while it's technically well-written, it's not fun to read. What would be fun to read? A restaurant review or two. And to places people would actually want to go. No more reviews of some Zimbabwean diner in Fife specializing in spiced goat brain. What would I do? Let's see, Tom Douglas is a radio host, why not go check out one of his places? What's his pizza place like? Anyway, that's my two cents. Awhile back I got the sense BM, even though he had a blog about radio, didn't actually listen to very much radio, and now that he does a blog about food, I get the feeling he doesn't go out to eat very much. To end on a positive note, everything on his blog is technically well-written.

[DT]

Can anyone here recommend any good Korean restaurants in the downtown Seattle area?

[sparky]

baking a cobbler for 3 hours??? Maybe if you like flaky cement....especially if you have rolled out those pie crust sheets really thin. An hour should do it..I will have to give it a try.

Hey Bla'M, would you like us to post some restaurants we like in the area or should we add to your recipes here?

If you are ever heading down I-5 south, you might consider Ramblin'Jacks in Olympia for to-die-for bbq, LaTarasca in Centralia for authentic Mexican food ( not that Azteca crap), Beaches in Vancouver,
or Caruso's in Keizer ( outside of Salem.) Beaches is on the water in Vancouver, pretty fun place to eat. Caruso's is off the freeway about 3 miles, on a small lake and features excellent Italian food.

[sparky]

Maybe a vegan out there can explain to me why eating an egg is "cruel."

[sparky]

and one more thing, Bla'M..how did you get a picture of John McCain wearing a toupee, underwater??

[joanie hussein for obama]

DT, you are like my kids who are always asking teacher or mommy to do everything for them. You go to a Korean restaurant and tell us about it.

Every year I find it necessary to remind my kids that bored people are boring people. You are in charge of making your life interesting.

BTW, how many tips have you sent Michael? I bet you've gotten your money's worth on this blog.

Write your review, Sparky. I'll read it! I love reading about food! I wrote a couple for another blog - Judy's something-or-other. Had fun doing it. But they weren't in Michael's league. Just a couple paragraphs on local places that I like. Still, it was fun.

Her blog started requiring long passwords to get in and I could never remember mine so quit it.

[sparky]

I only meant a review in the comments..not as part of his own writing!

DT..let your fingers do the walking through the yellow pages, or at least Google.

[joanie hussein for obama]

Oh, Michael, I wish you'd delete that picture. He looks like he should be impaled on a spit and roasted over coals. Ew!

Fascinating discussion with Kevin Phillips about American economy on Seder on Sunday right now. He thinks we may be on the edge of losing our credibility as a world power permanently.

He says the most troubling aspect is that the interest groups making money from all of our problems won't face up to the problems.

He named previous world powers that lost their power and it was usually as a result of war - they went broke. The road they took to losing power is the one we are on currently.

He says that the challenge of American politics in the next fifty years is how we get out of being the world's policemen and financiers.

He also said Greenspan didn't intervene at all and Berneke jumps in too rapidly.

book info and podcasts here but haven't tried to use them.

A great show if you can get it!

[joanie hussein for obama]

hmm, podcasts are problematic. If anybody can figure it out, let me know.

[blathering michael]

Naked or no, I love being known as "the emperor." DT: if you want restaurant reviews, read the newspapers. And what's the name of that Zimbabwean restaurant in Fife? -- sounds right up my alley.

[chucks]

Michael
I believe that used to be known as the "White Spot". In the enterest of becoming PC, it is now known as the "Right Spot".
Fife was a little behind the times.

[blathering michael]

Chucks: I always felt right at home at the White Spot. The Poodle Dog - not so much, especially after it went Korean. Maybe DT could get something there.

[joanie hussein for obama]

I remember the poodle dog . . . is it still around? Perhaps under a trendier name?

Fife was always more of a rest stop for me when I drove to Rochester/Oakville are where my parents had a farm.