KIRO newborn: too beautiful to live?

"I can tell you right now: the people in the BlatherWatch chatroom aren't going to like our show."

It's Luke Burbank talking and he's speaking of Too Beautiful to Live, the KIRO show he's premiering tonight (m-f, 7-10p) with sidekick/producer Jen Andrews.

He's hoping the title isn't prophetic.

Too Beautiful to Live is already a big hit with us-- it's stealing an hour from The Frank Shiers Show! (Frank claims that's OK with him, we suspect he's lying).

"I'm thrilled about working with Jen Andrews," says Burbank. , who used to produce Ron & DonThey've know each other for years, and he knew it was made in heaven right away: "She doesn't want to do battle of the sexes every day or have conversations about the viaduct." (that is cool... hard to meet a woman these days who doesn't want to talk viaduct).

Local talk radio falls into two categories, says Luke: "Either it's yelling and getting everybody frothed up about something the Edmonds City Council did, or it's talking about boobs."

We'll listen in tonight like everyone else-- Burbank says it's a show for people who like public radio but get bored with it; and like commercial radio but feel it's stupid too much of the time.

That would be us.

"The nighttime sports-talk/political talk tropes are what Bonneville is trying to get away from," says Burbank.

(Bonneville International, who owns KIRO and KTTH is one of the few media corporations willing to invest in new commercial radio ideas to revitalize audiences and snag new ones in order to survive and thrive. Like newspapers, radio's having a crisis: there's no attrition for the aging audience, and new media platforms are competing savagely. Some of B'ville's out-of-the-box formatics of late have been Washington Post Radio, which put that influential newspaper on the radio in DC; and the Nightside Project, an innovative show out of mothership KSL in Salt Lake City. They've pulled the plug on former, and we hear they're doing the same with the latter, but at least they've been trying).
 
(Photo: Jen Andrews)

They've given Burbank and Andrews pretty much carte blanch for 15 hours a week.

Burbank says a program director once told him: "I program my station from 6 a.m. to 6 p.m. Monday through Friday. Whatever else happens, I don't give a shit."

He shakes his head: "But here's Bonneville and [KIRO PD] Rod Arquette saying, 'we're going to go spend a bunch of money, and roll the dice on doing something at night in hours that aren't really useful or super important to us. No matter how many numbers you get at night, there's never going to be enough that makes it worth it. Let's do something at night, and try to figure out the next wave of how radio will sound." 

Although Burbank has worked in AM radio- KVI, and Metro Traffic, he's spent much of his career in public radio-- on Seattle's KUOW, and NPR. "I've always thought I was a little too interesting for public radio, and a little too smart for commercial radio," he says. "Now I have some people from commercial radio saying, 'we want to turn you loose at night to do whatever you want.' I've just been revelling in that."

TBTL will be very personal, according to Burbank. "We want to make the smartest, most esoteric show on commercial radio." 

Burbank swears that TBTL isn't just about luring a younger audience. It's more about a sensibility than age. "You'll never hear me saying this is a show for young people. It's going to be for people who are awesome."

(Using the word "awesome is, of course, both a sensibility and generational. Can you be awesome even though you refuse to use the word to describe anything short of an Act of God? We hope so).

The TBTL promises:

~ it won't sound like NPR
~ we'll be real people talking about our lives-- when politics and sports intersect with
   them-- we'll talk about them.
~ no scripts
~ no making mountains out of molehills
~ Mayor Greg Nickels will never be on the show
~ no boobs
~ you can be any age-- if you're into what we're into, it'll be fun to listen to.
~ you'll never hear that the Enumclaw City Council is up to their old tricks
~ he and Andrews will get on a studio scale every night, and announce their weights on-air.

Quotables:
"The measure of the show won't be: did we have 20 yucks per hour.we could have someone on who lost their son in Iraq, and we're crying for an hour. To me, if there are genuine human experiences going on in the show, funny or not funny that's really a good show. We're both joke-y people, but I want to make sure that we don't become Luke 'n Jen in the Nut Hut."

"You could make a pretty strong argument that we're not very interesting people.We have to hope that we are."

"There's nothing that sounds less awesome or young than declaring yourself the awesome, young show."

"TBTL will have a rich online life. "We're not going to ghetto-ize the online component, Burbank says. In my previous experience: you did something for the radio frequency, then if they twisted your arm hard enough, you kicked them a little afterbirth for the website, much to your chagrin."

"We're in an out-of-the-way timeslot which heightens the whole digital thing for us. We really need to be viable digitally. For people over a certain age, it'll be a radio show: and under a certain age, it'll just be a website that has a radio show."

"Why is anyone going to care what you weigh? The answer is, I don't know. But if Rush Limbaugh weighed himself every day I'd be interested in that... To me that kind of stuff is interesting and we just have to hope that given enough time, people will begin to be interested."

"I've done some radio production where I've really been myself, and it's gone well and other radio productions where I kind of bent my personality around where my personality should be, sand those thing have gone less well."

As we've reported, Burbank returned to Seattle in December after a few national years with NPR as a roving reporter; then as co-host of the beta Bryant Park Project, a multimedia morning newscast launched in October.

Andrew, who up until recently produced The Ron & Don Show at KIRO, has worked for Kirby Wilbur and Peter Wessbach at KVI, among others.

TBTL replaces Sportstalk, the self-explanatorially titled show vacated when New York Vinnie was fired last year, and placeheld ever since by Mike Brown.

Comments

[joanie]

Well, they've certainly conveyed what they're not going to be...I'm wondering what's left?

I think good talk radio may be the hardest thing to achieve there is. You have to please so many people's taste.

I wish 'em luck. Don't know that they'll win me back but I'll give them a listen when Randi gets on one of her ego-driven rants and Malloy's in one of his over-the-top rages.

If they can hang on until the election and if a Dem wins, Randi won't have anything to talk about. Good opportunity for Burbank and Andrews.

[abob]

The Burbank/Andrews show will be the typical guy/chick talk program. He will make stupid corny jokes; she will constantly giggle at everything he says. He will occasionally go off on a phony rant; she will pretend to be the voice of decorum who reigns him in. They will both devour most of their airtime engaged in vapid happy talk. Most of the conversations will devolve into banal discussions about dating, romance, pet peeves, and favorite recipes. Yeech.

[NoBS]

"I've always thought I was a little too interesting for public radio, and a little too smart for commercial radio..."

I'd add, arrogant enough to be a typical talk show host. No one who's ever worked for Metro is all that, sorry to burst your bubble Burbank. You've been lucky, and I'd wish you continued luck but sounds like you don't need it because (as you've pointed out without saying it directly) you're perfect.

[Tommy008]

The ballcap, the quarter profile turn , the smugly raised chin ugh if i met this guy at a bar i would instantly dislike him. the fact tht he was a longtime producer for macho wannabe, arrogant prick John Carlson says it all.

[andrews]

Way to give him a chance there Tommy ol boy!

[schmick]

You know? maybe it will be a welcome break in the evening from hard politics. You know? Ron & Don except not stupid.

[strpf]

Goldy should have had that slot.

[Tommy008]

I'l give the new guy and gal a chance but my gut instint tels me that Goldy deserves it more than them . That' s a begrudging vote for Goldy beacause i'ver been turned off by his "I went to Penn, and I'm terribly terible bright, actually brighter than almost anyone, and i'm only really comfortable shmoozing and cliquestering with fellow Jewish smartpantsers from the Stranger" but i think he'd could grow out of it and become a bigger person.

[Fremont]

We'll be listening...awesomely...

[My Man Dori]

This will be such a "gay" show.

[Tommy008]

Terrible start.BURBANK'S FIRST SCHEDULED GUEST is some guy who takes cheap shots at Celine Dion in a new book. i DON'T CARE about the book, and won't read it. Celine Dion has an incredible voice and has given a million dollars of her own money to Hurricane Katrina victims. That's ALL i need to know about her. Tinytown radio Pissants like Burbank and Monson can make fun of Celine Dion while she laughs all the way to the bank -and deservedly so.

[abob]

Luke Burbank will devote a major segment of his debut show to a Celine Dion tribute. I hope whoever stole Luke's testicles will be kind enough to return them. Burbank has been de-balled.

[AuthenticAndrew]

It's funny that Jen Andrews dumped R&D to "spend more time with her family" and woah, back so soon?

I don't mind Luke Burbank's cockiness, first it doesn't come close to Dori Monson, second his show is brand new, he hasn't proven anything so the humility is implied, whereas Monson takes every little bit of good fortune that comes his way and sticks it up his ego. He's just so generous to thank the listeners for making him the most awesome radio host in Seattle.

[andrews]

wadr AA: you come across as a genuine ignoranus.

[JustinAtheropinion]

And the Blatherwatch Boneheads weigh in on a show they haven't even heard yet.

Wish I could see into the future like you geniuses...

[andrews]

You could if you weren't covered by bozone.

[Bonjohn]

Reading the comments, seems as if Celine Dion is equally as polarizing as Hillary. Actually, there's probably a direct correlation between their fans and enemies, given Hill's supporter-chosen campaign jam. Looking forward to checking out the new show.

[Catlin Capital]

Burbank is a dick.

Here are the facts:

Monson
1. A sports radio show
2. A pissing match about government
3. An ignoramus that actually thinks he's smart

Ron and Don
1. Stupidity at its finest

Shiers
1. A dumb guy that should have his fat ass thrown out of the studio

[sparky]

i assume I am too old for this show because the title makes no sense. If it gives listeners something different, and they like it, then more power to them. i wish them well. Im wondering if this is going to be a local "Young Turks" kind of show, minus the politics.
I do give them points for not talking about the viaduct!! I thought you had to sign some sort of pledge to do so when you were hired at KIRO :-)

I would have to stream it to listen to it, so I will probably stick with Mr. Malloy.

[andrews]

Facts on CC:

Doesn't have a clue because of reintarnation.

[Catlin Capital]

Dori Monson..."a boy named Sue"

Governor Ed Rendell

[andrew]

Luke Burbank is presently on the Dori Monson show and seems articulate but suffering possibly by a little Dopeler effect.

[Catlin Capital]

Monson and Burbank on air together!

Oh boy better call the "helicopsters"...

[AuthenticAndrew]

I wonder why Dori hates Luke.

[Catlin Capital]

The Monson Burbank episode was the most manufactured garbage I've ever heard.

R.I.P Sports with Schwartz 2007-2008

[andrew]

Luke has a voice that may very well fit the 07:00 - 10:00 spot, kind of unassuming and definitely NPR-flavored. Hope he doesn't turn into a beelzebug.

[wutitiz]

Spot on, Justinatheropinion. Can he get his first minute of airtime before he's sliced & diced. In fact, give him 6 months to learn the craft. I remember how godawful dori was when he started, and now he's No 1 in Seattle.

Tommy, Luke Burbank was producer for Kirby Wilbur for several yrs. I'm 99% sure he was never with Carlson.

I won't be surprised if Luke does very, very well. If so it's welcome because 7-10 is a wasteland right now. What would you prefer, Dr. Joy Brown??

[andrews]

I think a lot depends on Jen Andrews; if she can contribute by backing him up with substance instead of glibido they may well have something going for them.

[My Man Dori]

Dori is a blue collar boy from Ballard. He worked late nights at the local grocery store, paid his way through UW and broke his back through the system to become the success he is today.

Luke Burbank is a preppy spiled kid that got everything handed to him including a new age worthless petty talk show.

[Catlin Capital]

For a guy not on the KIRO payroll Tony Ventrella sure sounds like part of the family....

[andrews]

You know, I too have wondered about that, do you suppose his role is like that of the farm subsidy wherein you paid not to work...but still allegiance to 'the firm'?

[wutitiz]

It's my understanding that Luke Burbank did dangerous undercover work for U.S. Customs for a number of years before he got into radio. That's hardly getting 'everything handed to him.' Stories from those days should provide fascinating fodder for his show.

[wutitiz]

It's my understanding that Luke Burbank did dangerous undercover work for U.S. Customs for a number of years before he got into radio. That's hardly getting 'everything handed to him.' Stories from those days should provide fascinating fodder for his show.

[Catlin Capital]

Talking about the Seahawks, taking a shower with your wife and dog or picking your nose does not constitute legitimate stories for a news talk radio station.

The fluffy Burbank format will not work.

KIRO has really lost its bearings.

[wutitiz]

Talk radio doesn't have to be all serious politics to be good. The best talk radio I've heard was a show about 20 yrs ago by a guy named Steve Dahl in Chicago.

He hardly talked about politics at all. He just had the ability to look at things from odd angles, which I suspect Burbank just might also have.

[Nevets]

Steve Dahl, the guy who blew up thousands of Disco records in centerfield of Comisky park that made the WhiteSox forfiet the second game of the Double Header. I used to listen to him to but for the Rock-n-Roll not talk radio.

[wutitiz]

Yes that selfsame Steve Dahl. You know why he blew up those disco records?
He had a morning show at a rock station WDAI in Chicago. This was before Howard Stern, who I'm convinced copied Dahl, and poorly. One morning I turned on the show and heard disco record after disco record. I was sure it was a spoof by Dahl, but after a half hour I called the station, and they told me they were now 'Disco-DAI.'

That's why Dahl took such exception to disco. I think he's still on the air in Chicago.

[Nevets]

That and "Disco Sucks". I cant count the times I was sent home for wearing a t-shirt that had those words on it.

[wutitiz]

Nice to know there's someone else who knows Steve Dahl. On another note, I've listened to the first hour of Luke Burbank and he's a radio genius the equal of SD.

[Zanzibar]

Will we get a one hour biography of a different segment of his life every night or what else will happen in that first hour?

I actually wish Sean D'Atori (SP?) had a show. He has one of the best sounding voices on Newstalk 710 KIRO.

[Andrew]

I think they are making good on their threat; it's NPR subject matter and tempo with commercial radio's willingness to express a point of view. I like it. I wish it was on at a time when I'd normaly be listening to the radio.

[Zanzibar]

It's very jarring when Luke's breathy, stoned NPR-sounding voice introduces Jeff Pogila(SP?) for news and traffic and Jeff goes into the news and traffic "AM Radio Style". I wish that, prior to each news and traffic break, we could have a 10-second long tone of ambient sound to ease us into the transition.

[SeattleJew]

To bootiful to be alib=ve?

zzz
squaladesalad
Lawrence Welk
zzz
Noth Korane srain Surjery
valoom
zzz
chepap vine
water torture
zzzz
zzz
zz
z
is he really gay, he seems sad?
sad?
s?
z
z
z
z
z

[joanie]

You guys listened to the first show? I missed it. Still on AA but shouldn't have been. A real jerk sitting in for Randi tonight.

This is one time I may agree with a-boob. A replay of the Cashman-Brooks/Foster?? morning show?

I can never remember if her name was Lisa Foster or Lisa Brooks!

Cashman was funny enough to carry it but is Burbank a comedian? What's the verdict so far?

Also, tommy, I sort of think that Goldstein comes off as a bit "precious" myself. But, a good intellect when he avoids the "cute" and the "I'm too funny to be believed!" Even the intro music "Revolution" is so adolescent somehow. Guess I'm just getting old.

Don't answer that. :)

[Tommy008]

Luke let us know tonight that he had in recent years worked for some 'really big productions in L.A. and really big productions in New York." Now he's back in Tinytown on the radio. Ummm-isn't that called -failure? Caught the last half hour of the show. Don't like it. Probably will never like it. He's not worth the viciousness i reserve for the likes of Dori and Frank .

[joanie]

Tommy, maybe management did miss the mark here. Frank got a lot of pr on this site. Isn't the maxim something about not caring what we say as long as we're talking about him?

I have to laugh. I had a pretty good time giving him hell.

[Tommy008]

oooh, precious Jen Andrews doesn't like us, and won't send us her picture. Awwwwwww. isn't that special. Add 500 BONUS POINTS TO MY GROWING DISLIKE OF THE NEW SHOW,

[andrews]

I listened to the first show of TBTL last night and I will have to reserve judgement at least until they have a week under their belt.
What I'll call 'getting-started' jitters seem to cause them to be somewhat dis-jointed at times at best and at worst just plain silly.
However, once they establish a rhythm they may in fact be entertaining and easy listening.
Refreshing to see that they don't appear to suffer glibido problems.

Def: glibido - All talk and no action.

[Jk]

This pseudo NPR/This American Life semi-hip stuff will never fly on Seattle's AM Radio. Sorry, us AM listeners want news/traffic weather and political issues not some Ira Glass flunkee who crawled back to his hometown after living in NYC for only 6 mos.

[Hugh G Rechtion]

Nice to hear Luke back on the air locally and felt he was at least a couple notches above the usual KIRO evening fare. I will give the show a little more time; I did count Luke saying "you know" 17 times during the hour plus I was listening. Stop that! Right now!