Monday oddems: bitchy, bitchy, bitchy...

~~What's going on at KIRO? Sources say more changes are nigh. (we've sure said that many times before!) Bets are Dave Ross will go back to the ayem; and who knows at night? They say PD Tom Clendening likes the Ron & the Don and would like to put them in Dave's PM drive, but is having a hard time convincing the Entercom puppeteers who intracontinentally jerk the strings at KIRO.

~~Things haven't quite sprung for The Commentators (KOMO, m-f, 10a-12p), the squawk-radio show (affectionately known as "The Taters" by our readers). It has KOMOTV contrarian blabbermouth Ken Schram and Pleistocene Republican talk host John Carlson (KVI m-f, 3-5p) mixing it up weekdaily. The first 3-month ratings trend put KOMO's Middays (10a-3p), at 23rd out of about 24. John-John and Ken-Boy will have to stop making it so collegial and spank each other a little more. They manage to get guests skimmed off the top of local news impressively. But the best guests in our soggy corner of the universe won't help if they continue to pull numbers lower even than the local talk radio toilet-licker, KTTH (remember KTTH?) who, with the help of Rush Limbaugh, the former No. 1 talker in Seattle, managed only to get it up to 15th in the market in that time slot.

~~Is This Thing On? Dep't. KTTH showed 24th in mornings, 15th middays, 23rd afternoon drive, and 23rd evenings.  Our guy says: "I wouldn't read too much into anything. It seemed to be an exceptionally volatile month. We need to see the next trend to see if this is the start of anything, or if it's just a bad sample (which is why hardly anybody cares about these monthly numbers.) That said, here are a few interesting points. KIRO's morning news had a very good month, jumping up to 7th place in the three-month trend (though still a far cry from where it used to be). Middays are also slightly higher. Evenings continue to fall (18th). Ross continues to struggle in afternoon drive. He placed 15th. KOMO's afternoon news was 11th; KPTK (Al Franken) was narrowly behind at 16th."

~~We admire the KIRO news. Maybe it's because we're kind of newsy ourselves, but we appreciate their award-winning, longsuffering efforts despite all they've gone through- the scaled back news blocs and the personnel cut-backs and resignations. Now we hear they're taking crap because we applaud them and are suspected as informers. We tell you, these people are too busy, too loyal and too damned suppressed to even answer our e-mails, much less leak anything to us.

~~Last week's Seattle Weekly cover chronicling the rise and fall of former KIRO talker Mike Webb corroborated what we've been saying for a year about our favorite station: "KIRO has gone from being a dominant radio institution to being one of the city's worst-rated major stations. The most recent Arbitron ratings trends in the critical 25- to 54-year-old demographic show KIRO being beaten at times by a Spanish-language station in Olympia." KIRO staffers fumed all week about responding to the article, but of course this is radio, and this is Entercom. They take a blood-oath of secrecy over talking about their business- no matter it's screamed out in headlines. (They could write to us about it...we'd give 'em all the space they need to air their dissatisfactions).

~~No matter that Ciscoe Morris (KIRO Saturdays, 10a-1p) "The Yodeling Gardener," and resident hunk at KIRO since Lou Pate left, has reportedly turned down offers for a peek-a-boo foto-spread for Men's Health Magazine and a reality show on the Gardening Channel involving futinia hedges and squads of hunky LA leaf-blowers in Hawaiian shirts and thong underwear. The former Wauwatosa church lawnboy says he won't take his clothes off for any kinda money. "Too much sun can kill a mighty Doug fir," he says, "nuff said." His commitment, he insists, is to the hydrangeas of the Pacific Northwest.

~~And he calls us homophobic! Mike Webb always says that former KIRO, KVI talk host Brian Maloney and right-wing blogger is a "closet case." The married ex-Marine spoke out against Webb in the recent Weekly piece. Now he's implied not only that we are gay, but we're involved with Maloney! Last thursday he wrote on his blog (it's taken it down, now) "Now he [Maloney] and Old Man Blather deserve each other, but I sure don't wanna know what happens behind closed doors." Hoo-boy, it's not easy being an old/young, racist, liberal/conservative, closeted homophobic fag and wannabe talk show host whose lover is in Massachusetts living with his wife. We feel like Jesus on Good Friday when he reportedly said to Helena Rubenstein: "Nails girl, you think you have problems..."

~~Speaking of bedfellows, Mike Webb used to chide us for "being in diapers," when he was a KFRC reporter out covering the protest beat in SF in the 1970's. After he saw how aged we actually are from the picture in the Weekly. He was not alone. Stefan Shortpantsky, ace Republican blogger, to whom we've been just awful, wrote to say, "Imagine my surprise when I saw your picture in today's Seattle Weekly and discovered that you're several times older than the 15 year-old your writing led me to envision you to be." That hurt our feelings.

Comments

[Ben]

I think its time that we tie Tom From KIRO to his easy chair , and put the head phone on his head and make him have on the styblehead show , for the full show ,Iam thinkin after that happens , he will switch his left sox to his right sox, and then he would put on the white helmet ( with the big chin strap ) and wait out side KIRO , for the small bus for a ride home! and Yes I know what your thinking the styblehead would be sitting right next to him ! Kepp up the good work Tom !

[Steven]

That Funny! Your Right About One Thing The ( Stiblehead ) ha ha . IS Just Bad Radio ! Its Time to Go back To NPR Or even The Lionel Show . it can be pod casted

[sparky]

Ah, but Cisco is not entirely truthful here. I received a "Master Gardener" calendar from my aunt for Christmas..its one of those "cute" (?) kind where nekkid fat people stand behind strategically placed pots, trowels, baskets of flowers, etc. Near the end of the calendar is a picture of, at LEAST, shirtless, Cisco, standing behind a strategically placed podium, giving a speech to a naked audience with their backs to the camera. He is holdingup the longest, bulgy-est crop o' brussel sprouts I have ever seen.

Oooh la la!

[RobP]

"The first 3-month ratings trend put KOMO's Middays (10a-3p), at 23rd out of about 24. John-John and Ken-Boy will have to stop making it so collegial and spank each other a little more."

Maybe if KOMO would actually PROMOTE the show (other than putting ads on the butt ends of Shuttle Express vans) people might tune in. But that's been KOMO big weakness - they don't promote themselves.

[Brian in Lacey]

my fingers are still crossed ! for a good night show from Kiro am radio .
I still Like the Idea of, the Scary Gary and the wonder Chimp! Left and right up and down in your face !!!!! show after midnight
and remember there planty of parking in the rear , and it still 45 degs in the city ! hooty hoo! you go Scary Hairy Oh Gary ! keep up the good work we are proud of you down here in the wet spot of the northwest.

[joanie]

Surprised Ross is edging out Franken. That speaks to the appeal Ross has in this area. I wonder if KPTK has made offers to Ross but he is just such a company guy?

Re his going back to mornings: I remember his discussion about finally leaving that early-morning shift and he was glad to be doing it. Going back to a 4AM alarm won't appeal at all. but, he'll do it if asked.

I'm not sure that is going to solve KIRO's problems. Also, Franken's show is a morning show off Air America. I wonder what would happen if they put Franken against Ross in the AM? Thom Harmann in the PM slot?

Oh well. I've pretty much left KIRO behind anyway. Except for the occasional Ross . . .

[JDB]

Is it possible that Brain Maloney and Mike Webb could just cancel each other out and disappear? Talk about a fight between Dumb and Stupid.

And to be accused of a 15 year-olds writing style by the minnow is like being called a homosexual by Mike Web in a derogatory sense...,

Oh wait, a two-for....

[trocar]

cisco naked, what a concept. I knew he was a Lutheran, but I figured he had his price like everyone else. I'd love to see him wearing nothing but a pair of tube sox, gardening gloves and the broccoli. BTW, Michael, what do you mean by "leaf blowers?"

[sparky]

I assume the money went to the Master Gardener's association for their programs, so I dont think the models got any $ for posing.

Oh, and he always talks about brussel sprouts, so it would have to be that, not broc! ;-)

[sclub]

Mikey thinks EVERYBODY is gay.

[baba booey]

We still like Webb. Sometimes you need crazy people on your side.

[stodge charger]

Indeed, vg.

[sparky]

Michael, i know you have the hots for Michelle Malkin...but you should read this:
http://www.dailykos.com/story
/2006/4/17/19922/7926

[baba booey]

She's "hot" in a Malaysian prostitute kind-of-way.

[joanie]

"Things haven't quite sprung for the Commentators" - I haven't seen it promoted either. But, I'm not much of a KOMO listener except that I do listen to their postgame shows occasionally. I always liked Tom Glasgow and really like Shannon Drayer - she's the best woman I've heard in sports! Glasgow earned his baseball skills at KIRO and it was cool to see him go on to a Seattle big-league media job.

Still, I don't think people look to KOMO for scintillating talk radio so may take time and a lot of word-of-mouth support to put KIRO on that particular map. Also, I caught it one time and it seemed sort of tame . . . there's not much appeal in that. Loved Schram's old town hall show. I think he'd be a draw without Carlson . . . IMHO :)

[snoutcounter]

You know things are going bad at KIRO when:( ) Come on guys everyone can play and I'll start us off. when KIRO acts like the Bush Adm.Bitching about the leaker on the wire tapping instead of about the wire tapping, here KIRO wants to know who is BM's spies instead of why their radio station is going down the shitter.

[JC]

my only surprise was that blather wasn't a Siamese twin, given his habit of using "we"

[sparky]

I just read over on http://ezraklein.typepad.com
that Brian Baloney Maloney takes credit for alerting Michelle Malkin to the anti-recruitment college kids in California, and she posted their personal info on her website and now they are getting death threats, and she refuses to take down their info.

I hope you are proud, Brian.

[PiR]

Maloney, the self-loating closeted gay guy. What a schmuck.

[sclub]

Mikey (PiR) is Blather's biggest fan!

[sparky]

oh PiR is not Mikey...I know who PiR is and he is NOT Mikey...lololol

[stodge charger]

PIR is one of us...

[baba booey]

yes amen vg

[sparky]

bingo

[baba booey]

Ah, I miss Charles and all the old sayings I took from him

[sparky]

I met Charles...he is not a very large man, but not sure he has the physique of a marathon runner...

[KS]

I like Schram and hope that the "Commentators" gets better ratings. Carlson is better than he used to be, like when he ran for Gov., which he shouldn't have.
They have good guests and expose both viewpoints which is something that many talk shows fail to do.

How did KVI do in the mornings ? Seems like they are better than KTTH - which is floundering. I see that Medved and mild-mannered Michael Savage (yeah, right) are getting the best ratings on that station. The Spanish speaking station out of Olympia is getting the best ratings. FYI - The highest ratings in the Arbitron ratings are typically rock or new country music stations.