bill o'reilly, rand’s glans, tony snow, ex-gays, scooter libby, naked republicans, arragghrrorwr!

~~Whyinell would the fill-in/auditioning John Procaccino (KIRO 9-noon m-f) who seems otherwise like a level-headed liberal, ask syndicated neocon talker Michael Medved (KTTH m-f, 12-3p) to act as an "expert" guest on the subject of the indictments and the burgeoning White House scandal around the hyping of the Iraqi War? Medved has been a staunch Bush supporter since at least 1999, and has rarely broken with the party line--even in the Republican insurrections of late. Procaccino's earnest interview was reminiscent of Fox News, like when Bill O'Reilly  recently "interviewed" Tony Snow, "political analyst" who spoke "in depth" about the scandals. A lot of that famous Republican poo-pooing was heard --maybe because Snow is no analyst at all but a partisan right-wing talk host and Republican political operative. Who knew? Well, just about everybody...We hope Procaccino, who's not doing a bad job, (he's not Frank Shiers!) can get some objective observers on the subject like say, James Carville?

~~Jeez, we're really getting bored with Seattle talk radio. Conventional wisdom is that Dave Ross is coming back to the 9-noon; Dori Monson (KIRO m-f, 12-3p) seems to stay put no matter what he says or does; it'll take 'em 2 yrs to get rid of NY Vinnie now that he's stuck in there. Mike Webb seems to have something on somebody upstairs--he's still spinning the same platters, and ranting the same rants. Is KIRO trying to duplicate itself from 3 years ago? (Sorry, boyz, the Mariners won't come back, and neither will your listeners if you won't come up with something new--beware the next Book--it's gonna be a lulu...) Meanwhile, Carlson (KVI m-f, 3-6p) bores us with the political rah-rah so hot when he was trying to unseat Governor Gregoire, but now that I-912 has lost its speed, it's just tedious, and the ratings show it. Bryan Suits' show (KVI m-f, 6-9p) has come down to just letters and numbers: acronyms, calibers, and distances in klicks. If you know what he means, you know what he means, the rest of us try in vain to listen to Vinnie or just go off somewhere and shoot ourselves. Mike Siegel rails away every morning to himself with his peculiar, angry litanies, Rush Limbaugh blarts his way through the mornings and no one in listens. (You can now buy a minute of Big Pants' ad time, they say with frequent flyer miles). Nothing seems to change around here on the radie-yo, except the ratings--they get worse. Satellite radio is starting to look good...

A new "ex-gay" radio network which hopes to start broadcasting in eight states, has given the movement a real boost. It started with Straight Talk Radio, a half hour program launched by Stephen Bennett and his wife Irene. Bennett, who describes himself as "a former homosexual," and has a long history in the 'ex-gay' movement--he's the Stephen of the famous "Adam & Steve" that were not, as many of us had hoped, Adam & Eve. Bennett's ministry firmly believes no one is born gay and that homosexual attractions are tragically unnatural. He claims that by dealing "Biblically" with same-sex attractions, homosexuality can be completely cured "just as drug addiction, alcoholism or any other sinful behavior." Bennett says although he abandoned his 11-year promiscuous homosexual lifestyle after becoming a Christian in 1992, he still has over 70 pairs of shoes.

Interesting to hear all the talk hosts talking about Bush SCOTUS nominee, Sam Alito's marvelous legal accomplishments and scholarly ways. He was picked for one reason and one reason only: he's against abortion and his nomination can be sold to evangelical Christians because he will rule against Roe vs. Wade if given the chance.

~~We watched the Republicans with their 2% approval rating among African Americans with all their cynical solemnity and crocodile tears as they got photo ops at the bier upon which civil rights pioneer Rosa Parks lay. Conservatives (not necessarily Republicans) were against the integration she so firmly and bravely stood up for. They called those acts in the South at that time, "an insurrection."

It seems the indicted Scooter Libby's 1996 bestselling novel The Apprentice, has gotten a revival, what with his career's latest movement. As you can read in this delightful New Yorker piece, it's just one in the long and distinguished annals of the right-wing dirty novel.
"Libby has a lot to live up to as a conservative author of erotic fiction. As an article in SPY magazine pointed out in 1988, from [William] Safire (“[She] finally came to him in the bed and shouted ‘Arragghrrorwr!’ in his ear, bit his neck, plunged her head between his legs and devoured him”) to [William F.] Buckley (“I’d rather do this with you than play cards”) to [G.Gordon] Liddy (“T’sa Li froze, her lips still enclosing Rand’s glans . . .”) to [John] Ehrlichman (“ ‘It felt like a little tongue’ ”) to [Bill] O’Reilly (“Okay, Shannon Michaels, off with those pants”), extracurricular creative writing has long been an outlet for ideas that might not fly at, say, the National Prayer Breakfast. In one of Lynne Cheney’s books, a Republican vice-president dies of a heart attack while having sex with his mistress." Libby has a feel for the scatological: "The narrative makes generous mention of lice, snot, drunkenness, bad breath, torture, urine, “turds,” armpits, arm hair, neck hair, pubic hair, pus, boils, and blood (regular and menstrual)." 

   

Comments

[sparky]

I tell ya Michael, first its the idea of Erin Hart naked, now its someone's "glans"...I just CANNOT read this blog while eating breakfast...urghl..

[P-1 Stern Fan]

it is so ironic that the "Ex-Gay" ministry movement was started right here in Seattle... "Exodus International" The 2 Founders of the movement Gary Cooper (not the actor) and Michael Busee left the ministry after falling in love with each other.. (Go figure) When your Gay your Gay.. These ministries only promote homophobia and self hatred.. What ever happened to "Live & Let Live"?

[P-1 Stern Fan]

oh.. and Michael you are so right about Talk radio in Seattle.. It is becoming very boring and "Predictable".. and of course as a huge Howard Stern Fan and Alan Colmes fan.. I am listening to more and more satellite radio and probably will consistantly since "X-M and Sirius" have come out with small Hand held recievers..

[blathering michael]

naked menopausal women, Republican glans, lice, snot, drunkenness, bad breath, torture, urine, “turds,” armpits, arm hair, neck hair, pubic hair, pus, boils, and blood (regular and menstrual)."
What's not to love about a blather morning, Spark? You probably should skip breakfast...

[sparky]

God will get you Michael, yes She will.....

[Lump]

blathering michael sez "naked menopausal women, Republican glans, lice, snot, drunkenness, bad breath, torture, urine, “turds,” armpits, arm hair, neck hair, pubic hair, pus, boils, and blood (regular and menstrual)."

Don't forget the Tabasco.

[Cyn]

Yes, KIRO has becoming predictable. Boring. Yawn. I agree that Procaccino is not doing badly. He is a big improvement over Shiers. I don't understand why the interview with Medved was chosen. It is becoming more painful to listen to Dave try to pull off a good interview juxtaposed in between the traffic reports and news in the afternoon. His show is terribly fragmented and it just doesn't flow as it did in a.m. I did see Dave's face in two back-to-back ads on CNN yesterday when I was watching on the gym TV. At least Dave was portrayed as the voice and personality of KIRO and not Dori. Bleech... Interesting to see the television marketing strategy for radio. As nice and pleasant a guy as Vinnie is, evenings have become painful. Vinnie brightens when the talk turns to sports. Otherwise, the talk and interviews are just lacking and somewhat embarrassing. No substance there. By the way, why would it take KIRO two years to decide to get rid of Vinnie when they managed to terminate Allan likety-split?

[Andrew]

I'm convinced Allen must have been difficult to get along with as agreeable as he might seem. They canned him before ratings came out suggesting they didn't care about ratings and he quit another station because the PD wanted to punch him or something.

I like the new guy OK. He's definately not what any listerner dreams of hearing when they grow up. He's like the friendly milk man whereas Shiers comes off like a proctologist trying to make small talk.

[sclub]

Vinnie's a friendly guy who needs more self esteem. Learn to say no like Lou Pate did.

[Cyn]

Speaking of satellite radio, I love my new XM subscription and the little portable receiver. It's a sweet little radio and the satellite offerings are a real treat. More and more of my radio listening time is going toward satellite and less and less toward a.m. KIRO, are you listening?

I agree that Allan must have exhibited some fatal personality quirk that lead to his demise. I still enjoyed him immensely on air.

Shiers as a proctologist trying to make small talk? OMG, that's hilarious.

[Ray]

I agree with the comments about local talk radio. KIRO is off my radar with exception of D. Ross. I can listen through some of Dori, but none of the rest get any of my ear time. Losing Allen Prell was just another bad call by KIRO mgmt. I did tune in Sunday for Allen's brief appearance on 1150am. Regardless of the content that evening, he is entertaining, something KIRO should have considered before letting him go. Let's hope Allen can land on a local station to add some color back to local talk radio.

Good job Blatherwatch in keep us update on the local dirt...

[Scrilla]

So, in summary: Mikey hates conservatives on the radio. Dave Ross will (or will not) return to his old slot. Suits is 100% Pentagon radio. Webb should go "ex-gay" for the ratings boon. Republicans cheered the passing of Parks. Vinnie is fat.
Insightful as always.

[blathering michael]

Scriller: no wonder you're a Republican:--you've got a reading disability. No wonder you have such a problem with reality...There's help for that.

[Trip]

So anyway, WTF is up with all these Republicans writing lurid freaky sex into their novels?

Bears? 10-year old girls? HUH?

[Andrew]

Because they like to kill animals for sport.

[joanie]

Interesting reading the number of people truly tired of local radio. I've recently rediscovered the sound of silence. It is not that bad, folks.

[Deborah]

Michael, I myself would not look at John Procaccino as a level-headed liberal. Just tried listening to his a.m. show this morning and what was the subject?......he was all "feelin' sorry for Bush" and believes he's been 'bushwhacked' by his cabinet and its time for the prez to stand up, tell 'em a thing or two, and then replace some of them. Procaccino basically said they have "done him wrong" and the poor prez needs to "take control" of the situation. LOL. Problem is.....Bush's whole presidency AND elections have been based on him as a puppet personality needing "stronger" ones around him telling him what to do, when to do it. (ie., cronies). And Procaccino was all "feeling bad for the president" ???????

[blathering michael]

Joanie: peace & quiet- feh!

Deborah: We can disagree on the particulars, but JP isn't a conservative. And remember, the job o'work for a tr host is to get people to call him up. He got you going and I'll bet there were people who were as mad or madder than you who rang him up and gave him hell. It's entertainment biz, first and foremost; policy righteousness is barely in the picture. Liberal or conservative? they're just formats to frame an audience. Conservaqtives realized this and learned to preach their evil gospel and make it entertaining. brilliant.

[Andrew]

I guess if you do on the internet what they do on the radio people will call you a troll.

[Deborah]

Well...you're probably right, Michael. It IS all just entertainment. But JP was certainly putting on a good act this a.m. Sure had me fooled but then again I only listened to one segment. Perhaps his alter ego resurfaced the next hour? There may be a bit of comfort in the thought that it might simply be a case of 'chameleonitis". Only wish we'd see more of BOTH sides. Deborah

[ExDem]

I don't think people who listen to talk radio programs truly want BOTH sides. People like to hear support for the ideas they believe in. That's why KIRO's talk lineup has always performed so poorly compared to KVI or KTTH. KIRO would have some liberal, then some conservative, then back to a liberal, etc.

People that are liberal don't want to listen to Dori Monson. People that are conservative don't want to listen to Dave Ross. So, instead of switching channels, people tune into the station that offers a consistent slate of the type of ideas they want to hear. People that are disgruntled, ultra-left, paranoid, conspiracy nuts tune into Air America - that's why AM 1090 can consistently draw the 17 listeners it gets every single day.

[Deborah]

But ExDem.......don't you think that talk radio would DRAW a LARGER audience if listeners could flip the on switch and know they could find a station that presents both sides and is more centrist? Networks such as KVI, Air America do appeal to those who are dead set , unwavering in their thinking and only want to hear an echo of themselves. Most people center somewhere around the middle depending upon the issue and the personality. I would consider myself to fall in that category although admittedly I do lean slightly left. And I do listen to both sides on the radio. It provides for a better defense! (thinking back to high school debate team). I would rather have a station or a host that presented all angles. I think the majority would also.

[ExDem]

Deborah,

In terms of ratings success, I'm guessing that there aren't enough people like you that want both sides. The formats that seem to have the most success are ones that stick to one side of the spectrum.

I also listen to both sides. But, I think the audience for talk radio tend to be people who approach their political ideology like it's a religion. They invest personally in their view points, whether their views are rational or not, and it's hard to convince them that an alternate view might be valid. The loyal listeners lead to ratings success, and the loyal listeners are probably the ones that are engaged/energized the most. The centrists probably tend to have other things they are passionate about and probably aren't devoted to listening to certain programs. As a result, the programs play to their audience in order to get advertising dollars. It gets old to listen to just one side for me, but for more rabid partisans, they can't seem to get enough confirmation of their world-view.

So, at least there are stations with competing formats - we get to choose and switch stations to find something intriguing any moment of the day (at least in the Seattle market or if you have XM radio or streaming internet).