Buzz kill. As much as oral sex has played in shaping our lives around here, the 'visuals' to the ubiquitous, throat-cramming cliché cannot be avoided. Could you spare us, please, and leave us our ancient oral-erotic fantasies?
'Going forward,' however, we'd like to 'touch base' and 'address the issue,' 'if we may.'
'Arguably,' we'd never 'diss' anybody, but we'd like to end the day of the next person on the teevee or radio who says 'end of the day,' or at least, put them in a 'lockbox' to 'chill'. They 'suck.' They don't 'rock.' They're plainly 'not awesome.'
Besides giving us blisters, being 'on the ground,' voting with our feet, and doing 'shoe-leather reporting' makes us feel 'under siege' or like going on a 'killing spree.'
Spare us that 'famously' 'slippery slope' at the bottom of which is that 'rathole' that politicians are always accused of throwing money down (after they've used whom or whatever they can as 'an ATM'). It's all in their 'play-book.'
Please don't drive us to commit 'political suicide;' swallow any 'poison pills,' or 'suffer' any other 'untimely' or 'fatal deaths.'
It may come as a 'complete surprise,' but 'the fact of the matter' is: We'd rather stand in a 'torrential rain' (or 'shower activity') than revisit 'revisit again,' hear 'sketchy details' of a 'senseless murder,' or a 'wardrobe malfunction.'
In 'no way, shape or form' do we ever want to hear about any 'small, little' thing 'ballooning' into something 'humongous' or spinning 'out of control.' 'Chaos,' is chaos, as any 'local legend, or political 'guru,' 'diva' or 'icon,' will tell you. It's always a 'definite possibility.' (What do you expect from a 'perfect storm'... a 'mute point?')
We try not to get 'emotionally charged,' but 'first and foremost' it's 'a no-brainer' that cliché usage in the media is definitely 'on steroids,' and has 'gone viral.' Unfortunately, it's 'in inverse proportion' to 'thinking outside the box.' Or thinking.
(This may be off-topic but could we please stop comparing politics to sausage production, and repeating Will Rogers' joke on Democrats about not belonging to an organized political party? It's funny, but he said it in 1932!)
'Kudos' to everyone 'out there' who 'stayed classy' and 'out of harm's way' in the language wars that threaten our media. Stay in 'close proximity,' BlatherWatch is a 'safe haven' for refugees, perhaps the 'last bastion' of hope. Maybe 'the mother of all' bastions...
We know that fighting triteness is futile, and the arc from stupidity is long (maybe infinity) but remember: 'Vote early and vote often,' and 'Christmas is just around the corner!'