Wow. We just saw our president of these United States on the T & the V and he is tan. We mean like brown...like a nut...or buerre noir...or Regis Philbin...or a roast chicken.
It is haying season, but we're pretty sure the big guy isn't spending that much time on his tractor. We doubt if he's had time to flop down on a beach blanket--though he coulda made a little side trip to Cannes, the other day, and whooda blamed him? (well, we woulda, I guess).
Our Commander in Chief and the Leader Of The Free World must be laying in a tanning bed on a regular basis!
This may be a little frivolous and vain for someone of his stature, but we're liberals--who are we to blame him for this particular unnatural act, when we've committed so many ourselves?
We're hoping he's tanning to help him relate to his desert-charred troops in Iraq. Maybe it's like when friends of chemotherapy patients shave their heads in a loving sympathetic gesture.
We'd like to think that's why President Bush is clam-shelled 3 times a week in a plastic bed to be pummeled with dangerous rays--it's the sacrifice he makes and the risk he takes to walk where they walk...to fry as they fry, to be all that he can be.
That would be spiritually ever so much more graceful than him trying to look like he just got off a jet-ski at Palm Beach. Or his Andover/Yale/Harvard honky self trying to resemble one of those Hispanic voters he's always trying to lube.
We can't help wonder if he nudes it on his electric beach. If he does, he'll have one of those white triangles on the crack of his ass where his tailbone meets the lucite--not a pleasant visual, but neither is the alternative of him wearing a bottom and having bikini lines.
Which is worse? a world leader (not just any world leader, but THE world leader) who looks like he's been out fighting Al Qaeda? OR a pasty-faced quebba like Tony Blair who looks like he just crawled out from underneath one of those Brit cars that always need fixing? (Culturally stunted, the Brits totally missed the cultural influence of the Beach Boys and Endless Summer that we enjoy.
It's a generational thing, maybe...after all, Bush is a Baby Boomer, the generation of lookin' good...
But whether he's considering Supreme Court justices; conferring with the leaders of the world, making decisions effecting American lives for decades to come--we for one, will never see President George W. Bush again without wondering which it is-- tan lines or cotton tail on his sorry old 59-year-old ass.
At least he is brown and not that toxic pumpkin-orange that John Kerry turned during the election. :o)
Posted by: MNM | July 12, 2005 at 07:05 AM
Bush has such a hell of a time staying upright, on a Mtn bike, regardless of the terrain. Me thinks he ate the missing yellowcake last week for his birthday before crashing into the policeman
Posted by: chris | July 12, 2005 at 07:38 AM
If memory serves me right, I think Bill Clinton had and still has a problem staying upright. Why the hell GHW Bush is hangining out with that philanderer is beyond me.
Posted by: Duane | July 12, 2005 at 11:15 AM
Clinton isn't the prez anymore, but most can't get over it, it seems...
Posted by: chris | July 12, 2005 at 11:43 AM
gawd..the thought of the Shrub lying nekkid in a tanning bed, shrinking his nuts with those B-rays....please. Stop this right now....
Posted by: sparky | July 12, 2005 at 08:16 PM